It was "Ours" but not anymore.

     Anyone who has been in a relationship, whether it be significant or not, knows what it means when something is said to be "OUR". For those of you who don't know what "OUR" means in a relationship it basically is a stake claim on something simple like a song, movie, or place that brings forth a surge of positive emotion when you see or here it. For example, in my one almost three year relationship with the guy I thought was "The One", OUR things were: "This Year's Love" by David Gray, "Mr. and Mrs. Smith", and the Monastery Garden in Staten Island. Awesome song, awesome movie, and awesome place.
     The problem with having "OUR" things is that when the relationship is over, every time we see something that was "OUR"s, we no longer get that surge of positive emotion. Instead, we get the heart-wrenching pain in our chest that reminds us it's over.
     My EX dumped me a few weeks before our third year anniversary. It was painful, but I cannot say I didn't see it coming. He changed. I changed. The only thing I knew for certain was that I still wanted to try and make us work; and, he didn't. Nothing you can do about that. I will admit I was a huge f*cking wreck. I honestly don't know how I got through my post breakup stages. But I will also be one of the rare people that admits this, but it took me a long f*cking time to get over it, a few YEARS, to be more specific.
    What made it worse was the unsuspected moments where the things that were "OUR"s would pop into my life. "This Year's Love" was on my iPod. Why? Because it's a nice song. We first bounded over that song and vowed to sing it to each other on our wedding day. I love that song. And, when my iPod was on the rare occasional shuffle, it would come on. In fact, I remember one embarrassing moment when I was on the train and it started to play. My eyes started brimming with tears and I quickly fumbled to turn it off. Mega-Embarrassing. And, for the longest time I couldn't watch "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" because my EX and I used to watch it every day; we had so many good memories involving that movie.
     Now, I'm sitting here writing this post. It's been several years after our break-up and you know what? I own "Mr. and Mrs. Smith". I watch it on my own because it is a fun movie. It entertains me. I erased all the memories I had with my EX tied to that movie. Now, I can enjoy it without a second thought to him. And, guess what? Today at work, I found myself singing "This Year's Love". Completely out of the blue. I hadn't heard the song in five years. (I took it off my iPod after that embarrassing day on the train.) I still remembered it, word for word. And, BONUS! I didn't cry or even thing about my EX and what we had together.
     I can officially say I am SO OVER IT. I am putting that song back on my iPod and I'm going to have it on goddamn repeat because I have missed it.
     That song and that movie are no longer "OUR"s. They are MINE. And, I know I'll make positive memories involving them on my own and not with another person to label it "OUR"s ever again.